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Rules of Parenting, The: A Personal Code for Raising Happy, Confident Children, Expanded Edition

By Richard Templar

Published by FT Press

Published Date: Apr 2, 2013

Description

There are lots of wrong ways to bring up your kids, but there are lots of right ones, too. There's no list of instructions you have to follow to the letter if you don't want your child to end up a loser. Richard Templar's The Rules of Parenting, Expanded Edition presents the principles to follow which you can adapt to suit you and your children. Templar -- author of The Rules of Life and many other best-sellers -- has brought together 100+ parenting tips you can start using instantly. Now updated and expanded with 10 brand-new rules, Templar's rules address everything you need to know from start to finish. Beginning with the first rule "Relax" and continuing through 100+ rules, this book presents a guide to everything a parent needs to know from toddling, school, boyfriends or girlfriends, through driving lessons and college. The book begins with a section that covers the most important rules, The Rules for Staying Sane. The rest of the sections cover some of the big questions of parenting, including the Attitude Rules, the Discipline Rules, the Sibling Rules, the School Rules, the Teenage Rules, the Crisis Rules, all the way up to the Grown-up Rules.

Table of Contents

Contents
Introduction     xi
Part I Rules for Staying Sane     2
1 Relax     4
2 No One Is Perfect     6
3 Be Content     8
4 Know What You’re Good at     10
5 Almost Any Rule Can Be Broken Occasionally     12
6 Don’t Try to Do Everything     14
7 You Don’t Have to Follow Every Piece of Advice You Get (Including This One)     16
8 It’s Normal to Want to Escape     18
9 You’re Allowed to Hide from Your Kids     20
10 Parents Are People Too     22
11 Don’t Ignore Your Relationship with Your Partner     24
Part II Attitude Rules     26
12 Love Is Not Enough     28
13 Every Recipe Needs Different Ingredients     30
14 Anything Extreme Is Almost Certainly Wrong     32
15 Look Pleased to See Them     34
16 Treat Your Child with Respect     36
17 Enjoy Their Company     38
18 It’s Not about You – It’s about Them     40
19 Being Tidy Isn’t as Important as You Think     42
20 Good Parenting Is Calculated Risk Taking     44
21 Keep Your Worries to Yourself     46
22 See Things from Their Point of View     48
23 Parenting Is Not a Competitive Sport     50
24 Never Emotionally Blackmail Them     52
Part III Everyday Rules     54
25 Let Them Get On with It     56
26 Let Them Go (Wild)     58
27 Teach Them to Think for Themselves     60
28 Use Praise Wisely    62
29 Make Sure They Know What’s Important     64
30 Show Them How to Lose     66
31 Know the Value of Boundaries     68
32 Bribery Doesn’t Have to Be Bad     70
33 Moods Are Catching     72
34 You’re Setting Their Eating Patterns for Life     74
35 Communicate     76
36 Set Clear Targets     78
37 Don’t Be a Nag     80
Part IV Discipline Rules     82
38 Present a United Front     84
39 Carrots Beat Sticks     86
40 Be Consistent     88
41 Lighten Up     90
42 Focus on the Problem, Not the Person     92
43 Don’t Paint Yourself into a Corner     94
44 If You Lose Your Temper, You’re the Loser     96
45 Apologize if You Get It Wrong     98
46 Let Them Back in     100
47 The Right of Expression     102
Part V Personality Rules     104
48 Find What Incentives Work for Your Child     106
49 Every Child Should Have Something He Knows He’s Good At     108
50 Learn to Appreciate the Qualities That Remind You of Someone Else     110
51 Look for the Similarities Between You     112
52 Find Qualities to Admire in Them     114
53 Let Them Be Better Than You     116
54 Their Attitude Is as Important as Their Achievements     118
55 Keep Your Fears and Insecurities to Yourself     120
56 Mind Your Programming     122
57 Don’t Try to Have a Perfect Child     124
Part VI Sibling Rules     126
58 Give Them Each Other     128
59 Recognize that Squabbling Is Healthy (Within Reason)     130
60 Teach Them to Fight Their Own Battles     132
61 Work as a Team     134
62 Let Them Entertain Each Other     136
63 Never Compare Children with Each Other     138
64 Different Children Need Different Rules   140
65 Don’t Have a Favorite     142
66 Mix and Match    144
67 Find Each Child’s Strengths     146
Part VII School Rules    148
68 Schooling Isn’t the Same as Education    150
69 School Comes as a Package     152
70 Fight Your Child’s Corner    154
71 Bullying Is Always Serious    156
72 Teach Them to Stand Up for Themselves    158
73 Put Up with Friends of Theirs You Don’t Like    160
74 Remember You’re Their Parent, Not Their Teacher    162
75 Don’t Spoil Them     164
76 Let Up the Pressure     166
77 They Have to Live with Their Choices (and It’s OK)    168
Part VIII Teenage Rules     170
78 Don’t Panic     172
79 Remember Newton’s Third Law     174
80 Give Them a Voice     176
81 Don’t Look Under the Mattress     178
82 Running Around after Them Doesn’t Help Anybody     180
83 Don’t Stand in Front of a Speeding Train     182
84 Yelling Isn’t the Answer      184
85 Let Them Have the Last Word     186
86 Everything Comes with Strings     188
87 Show Some Respect for the Things They Care about     190
88 Adopt a Healthy Attitude to Sex    192
Part IX Crisis Rules     194
89 Don’t Use Your Kids as Ammunition     196
90 Let Them Cope in Their Own Way    198
91 Being Younger Doesn’t Necessarily Speed Everything Up     200
92 The Aftershock Can Last Forever     202
93 Tell Them What’s Going On    204
94 Teach Them to Fail Successfully     206
95 It’s Better to Agree Than to Be Right     208
96 All of Your Actions Speak Louder Than Any of Your Words     210
97 Make Sure They Know They’re Priority No. 1     212
98 You Can’t Fix Everything     214
Part X Grown-up Rules     216
99 Back Off     218
100 Wait Until They Ask for Advice     220
101 Treat Them as Adults     222
102 Don’t Try to Be Their Best Friend     224
103 Encourage Them Regardless     226
104 You Can’t Choose Who Your Children Love     228
105 Leave the Strings Off     230
106 Don’t Guilt-Trip Them     232
107 Remember They Still Need You     234
108 It’s Not Your Fault     236
109 Once a Parent, Always a Parent     238

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ISBN-10: 0-13-338426-8

ISBN-13: 978-0-13-338426-0

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